My brain is constantly racing, constantly filling up with ideas that seem to fall right out of my head when I am not paying attention. As I go about my day, I come up with all kinds of things to talk about in my blog, but when I actually sit down to write, I forget 90% of them. Then the other 10% I don’t know if should right about due to possibly controversies with the topic or with my opinion on the topic. Which brings us to….. "OH WELL, IT’S MY BLOG! I will say what I want to say!" :-P
Lately one of the most constant things I have had on my mind is (for obvious reasons) PARENTING. Sometimes I see and hear about things that other mothers (and fathers) do with/to/for their children and I think I know better, that I KNOW that they are doing something wrong. But then when I hit my high points of frustration with my own son, I fear I really know nothing, and sometimes even doubt that I am a good mother at all.
One thing that bothers me the most is the issue of nutrition. Granted, I am not an expert and I am definitely overweight myself, but I do have some basic skills concerning what I, and my baby, SHOULD eat. (Self-control is a whole other issue, lol). Every day, I make sure that Logan eats plenty of vegetables, plenty of fruits, some form of protein at every meal, and lots of milk and water to drink. I also try to limit his intake of empty carbs and sugar (i.e. juice and crackers). When I see parents feeding their kids fruit loops and juice all day long, it makes me crazy. Or when their child’s meal consists of only some fruit and noodles. Or just fries and soda at McDonalds. I just want to scream at them: "YOU IDIOT!! You are the reason America’s children are having a rising problem with obesity!!"
But then I look at Logan and see how chunky he is and I wonder what I am doing wrong. Like I said, I am trying so hard to make sure he eats balanced meals, but then he does get empty calories at snack-time Monday through Friday at daycare. Also, except for a few rare amazing instances, Logan has not slept through the night since he was about 10 months old (this is of course after waiting until he turned 4.5 months old to even START sleeping through the night in the first place – it was a lovely 5 and a half months while it lasted). So Logan goes to bed at 8:00pm every night, then lately he is up by 11:00pm screaming for a bottle, and we are lucky if he will go back down until 6:30am before wanting another bottle. We have just recently switched him completely to cow’s milk from formula, so at least that is a little bit lighter on the calories, but still! He gets two extra bottles a day that other kids his age are not drinking (I think). He shouldn’t even be taking one when he wakes up because they feed him breakfast at 8am at the daycare, PLUS he is taking that extra one in the middle of the night. I just don’t know what to do. Should I refuse to give him a bottle in the middle of the night and just try to comfort him back to sleep with cuddles? Should I let him cry himself back to sleep until his body adjusts to not getting food at that time? Should I keep feeding him in the middle of the night and cut back his food portions during the day? I just don’t know what to do and I don’t want to make him miserable in the process to fix things. But I also don’t want him to be doomed to be fat his whole life like me. L
The only upside I see to all this is that at least I know that Logan gets PLENTY of nutrients for his little developing brain. At least he is and will be very smart! Some babies I know definitely do not get the proper nutrition they need to feed the development of their growing minds and bodies, and that’s just sad.
I know I have a lot of friends who are parents, but sometimes I feel like it is taboo or weak to ask for help. And my husband always wants to follow doctor’s advice rather than just parental hearsay, since every parent has different views and prejudices, and every child is different. But I think that sometimes reaching out to others who have already been through similar battles to the ones you are facing can give some helpful insight. So, bring it on, people. Logan and I need your help! (Especially me, I haven’t had 8 hours of continuous sleep in a LONG TIME!!)
Thanks!
Mousefreek Mickie
Don't stress so much about Logan being chunky at this point in his life. Almost ALL babies are chunky. Once he really starts being more active, you will notice his chunk fade away. Noah no longer walks, he runs. LOL It sounds like you are doing a phenomenal job iwith balancing his meals! Good for you! Its always in the back of my mind that I don't want Noah to be fluffy like me, but I really try not to stress about it at this point. You just need to continue with good eating habits for Logan, and you shouldn't have to worry about this until he is much older and starts asking you for soda, cookies, etc. LOL
ReplyDeleteLove you!
Tanya
Tanya's got a point. I've never seen a phsycially fit child. There's nothing wrong with being heavier, every human is different. There's actually quite a few of us in the family of cousins that aren't thin- Jess, you and I are not thin. Allen and Barry aren't super thin-fit either. Just relax there!
ReplyDeleteFrom the parenting perspective, I can't help you, Kudos to keeping his meals balanced. I'm trying to do that now with my own and lose weight and it's a slow process. I'm hoping to eventually be thinner, but I'll never be thin. I would think if you just cut him off the extra at night, cut one then once he gets accustomed to that start cutting the other one. The only advice is coming out of just my own thoughts. I know with bottle raising animals it's easier on the animals to readjust if you cut them off cold turkey and ignore their cries. eventually they learn that the screaming doesn't get them anything and they stop. Again, that's with livestock, the thought process may not be the same with humans.
It is not Tabboo or Weak to ask for help. actually I think higher of people that will ask for help when they need it.
BTW, this is your Cuz, Heather
Wait til he starts really moving and running all over the place, babies are what babies are at this point. My brother was a chunk and a half as a baby, but by the time he turned 3 he was practically a toothpick.
ReplyDeleteYou are aware and working on it, good for you! Keep it up. Help him learn proper portion size and go with your intuition.
Something you might try for the middle of the night bottle, is putting water in it. That was you're offering him something if he's thirsty, but helping his body get used to the idea that it's not a meal time. Once his tummy re-adjusts to the difference he will "probably" stop waking for it.
And it's never taboo or weak to ask for other opinions! You might not like all the advice that pours in, but remember, it's what works for their (our) kids, and Logan is not their (our) kid.
Try it out, look for different ideas, but above all, go with what feels right to you and for all of ya'll.
<3
You are doing a great job at raising Logan! The fact that he gets up in the middle of the night is fairly common from what I know of with talking with other mom's. Decrease the amount he gets to drink in that middle of the night bottle slowly and he'll get used to sleeping with less in his stomach. Alexis slept through the night for a looong while and then spent about 4 months getting up crying EVERY NIGHT and would be up for at least 30-minutes. I would just pick her up, rock her in my arms til she fell back asleep and put her back to bed. Taylor still likes to get up at 5:30AM though he sleeps through the night. Kelly is still trying to figure out ways to make him sleep better/longer.
ReplyDeleteAs for the feeding, keep up what you're doing. He's perfect and if your doctor was concerned, they would have said something. I keep Alexis's meals as well-rounded as possible, but I am realistic about what she will actually eat. I ALWAYS give her the option of eating things, and let her make her decision about eating the things on her tray. (Preemies are picky eaters though!) Taylor on the other hand only eats chicken, potatoes (usually fry shaped), and some fruit from time to time. He literally refuses to eat ANYTHING else no matter how hungry and starved he may be. If you were to see him eat you'd probably classify Kelly as the "awful mom who feeds her kid junk" but when he'll eat NOTHING ELSE no matter how denied and starved he is and you've tried days and days of giving him nothing but the things he won't eat... something's gotta give.
The bottom line is, mom's are your best resource for things that you can try. Your doctor knows medically what is best theoretically for your child. When the day is over though, YOU know what is best for your child and what will lead him to success and that's what matters most. Don't doubt yourself.
Jenn